Upanishads

I AM THAT

Chapter-15

Everybody has his Uniqueness

Third Question

 

 

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The last question:

Question 3

OSHO,

I AM AN EX-CATHOLIC MONK I AM LEAVING FOR MY COUNTRY TOMORROW. WILL YOU TELL ME FEW JOKES FOR MY OTHER CATHOLIC FRIENDS?

John,

The first:

A CATHOLIC, a communist and a black Southern Baptist arrived at the Pearly Gates on the same day. Saint Peter came out and the Catholic threw himself face down in front of him and cried, "Oh, Saint Peter, great have been my sins! I don't deserve to enter Paradise!"

"Have faith," said Saint Peter, "for our Lord is both great and forgiving. Spell God!"

The Catholic was taken aback, but waveringly said, "G-o-d." Trumpets sounded, an angelic choir began to sing, and the Pearly Gates swung open. The Catholic got up amazed and walked into heaven.

The communist, watching all this, quickly fell to his knees and started to cry, "Oh, Saint Peter, I have been a communist all my life. I have not been in a church all these years -- surely I don't deserve to get into heaven!"

Saint Peter smiled and said, "Brother, all men are the same in the eyes of God. He is great and forgiving. Just spell God!"

The communist took a deep breath and quickly said, "G-o-d." No sooner had he finished than once again the trumpets sounded and the great choir of angels sang out. The Pearly Gates opened and the communist happily entered heaven.

The black Southern Baptist immediately threw himself on the ground, started crying and beating his chest: "Oh, Saint Peter, it is no good! I've been a wicked man, drinkin' and runnin' with loose women. But I've been to church every Sunday and I reads the good book!"

Saint Peter looked at the black man and smiled, "All right, brother, God is great and forgiving. To enter through these gates all you have to do is spell Engelbert Humperdinck!"

Second:

A monk from a Catholic monastery wrote to his mother, "On cold mornings I often miss the old pot under the bed."

She wrote back, "On cold mornings you often missed it at home too!"

Third, and the last:

Sister Mary was taking tea to Mother Superior. When she reached Mother Superior's room she bumped the tray and spilt the tea.

"Oh, shit!" Sister Mary said. "I spilt the tea... oh damn, I said shit... oh Christ, I said damn... oh fuck, I said Christ!"

 

Next: Chapter 16, It is Already the Best, First Question

 

Energy Enhancement          Enlightened Texts         Upanishads           I Am That

 

 

Chapter 15

 

 

 

 

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