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ICM Library Foundation

When A Child Feels Unwanted and Ignored.
The Birth of Attention Seeking Egoism and Addiction to the Energies of the Second Chakra.

When the child feels ignored, then it needs to create a situation in which it will be the centre of attention. The child is used to being the centre of attention and is used to receiving 100% second chakra energy from it's parents (if you do not understand the reference to the second chakra then please read - ICM: Introduction to the Seven Chakra). The child needs to be guided into its own independence so that it will not feel this terrible loss and feelings of abandonment when the energy of the parents or other 'parent figures' is directed elsewhere as it is in the ordinary day.

The child who feels ignored, will soon learn a whole repetoire of behavioural techniques which it can use to get this energy - this attention - that it mistakes as love. If the parents also have never understood or received real, heart love, then they will not be able to guide the child out of this dependence upon the second chakra energy, in fact, through their unfortunate ignorance, they will guide the child into further damaging behavioural patterns. Such is the ordinary day.

These behavioural patterns that the child develops will later become the social sickness of attention seeking egoism. The child, now grown in body, may find it difficult to form lasting and meaningful relationships with the world and also with itself. This deep sense of social failure will feed the sense of lonliness, isolation, and separation. This pain of separation will then be disguised in all manner of denial strategies, because very few people really want to honestly confront these inner pains.

It seems too unbearable to admit, so instead we deny.

Denial requires all sorts of behavioural patterns to keep up the pretence, the illusion that 'all is well', when infact it is not. The accumulation of all these strategies has the effect of feeding inflated egoism. The egoist is separated from their own true nature, from true happiness, and is caught in the cycle of always having to "prove themselves". This "proving" to others that they are better or worse than others is again a symptom of lack of balance and failure to reach solid inner ground.

The egoist cannot simply 'be' with other people, they are always requiring the limelight (because they felt ignored as a child), and have a way of monopolising situations to bring the full attention of others onto themselves - onto the little 'me'. This attention seeking behaviour directs other peoples energies towards the egoist. On an energetic level, the egoist is feeding off the second chakra energy of others. (read Integrated Chakra Management: Psychology)


Because as a child they mistakingly believed this energy to be real love. Because they have not been properly education and guided to feel their very own connection with the unlimited love which everybody has in their hearts. Because as a child, they were not properly weaned off this second chakra energy. (see ICM: Egotistical Strategies and Oedipus/Electra Complex)


In Summary.

The child who felt ignored has much awaking and inner work to do if they are to change the course of fate. This work need nor be a burden, it can the source of great joy and enthusiasm. The direction that this unhealed childhood pain can take a person is very damaging and may lead to a pretty horrible life full of lonliness, pain, bitterness, jeolousy, hatred, and deep resentment, anger and regret. It can lead to all manner of addictions; to people, to things, to sex and alcohol and drugs. It is a very nasty state of being to be in.

So what can be done to avoid this outcome? We need to sincerely acknowledge that all is not well and then we need to begin to heal and understand ourselves. We can all get out of this situation, but it requires dedication, patience, and a genuine and sincere desire to get well and be a good, useful, healthy and loving person.

Remember, everybody wants to be happy and we all need to find the right route to that place. This route is available through Yoga, Self Healing, Meditation, and Self Understanding. All these things and more have been synthesized into one system called - Integrated Chakra Management.


Related Study.